maya angelou

last night, i went to see maya angelou at the paramount theater. i really didn't know what to expect, since i usually associate poetry with small, intimate readings at cafes and the like... plus, the only other productions i've seen/heard about at that venue are things like concerts and musicals :)

it was so wonderful though! i'm so happy that janice had an extra ticket and thought to invite me, because i don't think i would have otherwise thought of going. as we were leaving the theater, she said that she felt "richer" from being there, and i couldn't agree more...

the theme of her sharing was "rainbows in the clouds". her refrain went something like this: "when it seems like the sun ain't gonna shine anymore, god put a rainbow in the clouds" :) she talked about the people and the poetry that had been rainbows in HER clouds; how poems had demonstrated to her that other people had felt how she was feeling and that they had survived (and thrived!) and how that enabled her to also survive too. it's really about having hope, and knowing that we are part of a collective experience. she encouraged us all to be thankful for the rainbows in our clouds, and to take advantage of opportunities to be rainbows in other people's clouds too.

she also said something very interesting about courage being the most important of all the virtues, because only when you are courageous can you truly be/exemplify any of the other virtues *consistently*. we can be kind, or patient, or loving erratically (that's what it sounded like when she drawled out that word!), but we must be courageous to be those things in all situations and circumstances.

you'd think that someone as accomplished as dr. angelou would be really serious, but she was so warm and down to earth, and surprisingly funny! she shared a secret survival tip with us all: the most important thing is to always be able to laugh... :)

the jane austen book club [karen joy fowler]

this book is about friendships forged through a love of jane austen, about a book club of people (most of whom only knew one another though jocelyn, the organizer of the club) that sees each other through some of the roughest things we can experience in life and who together, learn important lessons about love and life as they view their day to day experiences through the lens of austen's writing.

they meet once a month to discuss a book and actually, seeing their example has inspired me to want to begin such a book club of my own. sharlene and i have talked about reading a classic a month, but we'd be discussing mostly over the phone or email i think.. the hazards of a long-distance book club. a part of me longs for a local version of that too though, evenings by the fireplace or by moonlight, sharing snacks and sipping on drinks and chatting about books.

if you look at life as the plot of a story, "... all parents wanted an impossible life for their children -- happy beginning, happy middle, happy ending. No plot of any kind. What uninteresting people would result if parents got their way." (p. 179) but through the course of the story, the characters all realize that, beyond a certain point, we don't need to seek out the unhappy times, or to dwell in this state of self-pitying emotion, but to truly *sieze* the opportunity to be happy each day. this can be seen in how allegra and sylvia extend forgiveness and a second chance to corinne and daniel, despite the seemingly unforgiveable things they had done. they are willing to overlook the pain that their lovers had caused them, and to make themselves vulnerable again by trusting again, and it is this that allows them to have their happy ending. "Sylvia was not a happy-ending sort of person herself. In books, yes they were lovely. But in life everyone has the same ending, and the only question is who will get to it first. ... What if you had a happy ending and didn't notice? Sylvia made a mental note. Don't miss the happy ending." (p. 243)

" 'I guess I think we all deserve more than we earn,' said Sylvia, 'if that makes any sense. I'd like the world to be forgiving. I feel sorry for Dick Musgrove, because no one loved him more than he deserved.' We were quiet for a minute, listening to the fly buzz, thinking our private thoughts. Who loved us? Who loved us more than we deserved?" (p. 237) but yet, the converse of that desire to be loved more than we deserve is that we need to love others in spite of their faults. we need to extend grace to cover each others' shortcomings, and to make love work in the face of so much that can tear us apart. as fowler writes, "You didn't walk out on someone you loved. You didn't sit silent while they poured their drunken hearts into your phone machine, as if you didn't even hear them. People in love found the one way to stay together." (p. 178)


the book ends with this quote:
"The mere habit of learning to love is the thing." - Jane Austen

it is apt because all of the characters learned to love in its many varied forms --whether it was to fall in love for the first time (like jocelyn and grigg), or for the twentieth time (like bernadette), or to fall in love again with their husband (like prudie) or to allow themselves to remain in love with someone who had hurt them (like sylvia and allegra). would this have been possible if it was a book club reading any other author? :)

bergdorf blondes [plum sykes]

this is like a cotton candy book.. totally something easy to read and engaging, and really funny in a social-commentary-on-the-rich kind of way. i flew through most of the book when i was keeping a bedridden noah company yesterday night, and then finished it off this morning when i took a coffee break at a starbucks near my office. i was totally in the mood for something fun and light, and this was the perfect meringue of a book for the occasion...

i often find it so much easier to sink into a book when i like the characters that i meet within it. like, i really liked "moi" (as the first-person protagonist referred to herself), a self described "champagne bubble of a girl about town" who was sweet and funny, smart and observant, and in general, a very likeable guide into a glamorous world so unlike my own...

not that this was a completely fluffy book though! it was actually kind of DARK in some respects, and made me think a lot about how well we really know the PHs (prospective husbands, according to the lingo of the park avenue princesses) in our lives. it's super easy to be so smitten with someone that you imagine them to be everything you've ever dreamed of, to read deep significance into their every comment/action, and to essentially *deceive* yourself like the protagonist of this novel did time and again. now at the end of the book, i really DID want to believe that charlie was different from the other guys, but while he definitely demonstrated some positive characteristics, i had to feel like we simply didn't know enough about him yet to really make a good decision! i also sensed an unstated premise (which i fundamentally disagree with) that the girls could not be happy or liberated from their socially confining state without finding true love. because i believe there is merit to being a complete and content person in and of yourself, without seeking validation or worth in the (potentially fickle) affections and attentions of another.

although, that being said, even i cannot deny the truly magical nature of being in love! how could i NOT just meeeeelt when charlie says at the end of the book, "sometimes i think you were made especially for me"? :)

reading lolita in tehran [azar nafisi]

i had first spotted this book at a little bookshop in pioneeer square when julie was visiting back around new years. it looked intriguing, but i had such a big pile of books-to-read that nothing ever really came of that...

until about two months ago when yaz sent me this book in the mail with a note... "you have to read this book. i loved it. please tell me you love it, too. is it ghetto that i sent you my dog-eared copy? whatever. just do it." now, yas is going to play a pretty notable role in this blog because we have been an informal "book club" for gee.. i guess it's been almost six years! ever since we first left for college, we have had hours of conversations about books we love, books we want to read, books we recommend (and even, quite frankly, those books that just aren't worth the time :)). but to receive this somewhat impassioned, scrawled note, it's still quite out of the ordinary. and having been sent her "dog-eared copy" (with the wonderful sense of *sharing* in an experience with one of my closest friends) was almost like.. what are you waiting for? your life is about to be changed; please, don't dawdle! :)

so i started.. and it's like one of those books that remind me of why and how much i love reading. it actually is what first inspired the thought of creating a reading log. haha or a reading b-log to be more exact i guess! just a place to write down thoughts that i gathered from my reading.. i guess it's more for me than for other people, so i'm not really writing for an audience, but then again, i don't reeeeally see it as something that needs to be *completely* private either. ah, the beauty of relative anonymity in the vastness of the innnnternet :)

but i digress...
i have to say again that i loved this book. i learned a lot about the history of iran (for example, did you know they were considered quite liberal in their thinking prior to the revolution when the islamic republic was formed?) and was introduced to a cast of ladies who became like friends, and whose experiences taught me to be able to empathize with a set of struggles and challenges that are so different from my own. (i also realized over and over again how a lot of the liberties and freedoms that i take for granted are actually denied to women *today* in other parts of the world! it's really the current-ness of this that surprises me the most i guess!) it was also interesting seeing how some desires and dreams are universal, and span all sorts of cultural divides... beauty, love, justice, peace, faith in something worth believing in, just to name a few...

it was also a very pointed reminder of how truly great literature can touch us so deeply that we are changed through the meeting. the book is broken up into four themes, through which the different parts of her story are told in conjunction with a work of fiction that serves both as a character in the action (usually as the book being studied by her students in class) and as an guide to understanding the implicit lessons to be learned through the events described.

from lolita, the women see that they can escape being completely possessed by ANY jailer (whether physical or symbolic), no matter how powerful or dominating. "the only way to leave the circle, to stop dancing with the jailer, is to find a way to preserve one's individuality, that unique quality which evades description but differentiates one human being from the other." they also examine why it is we find enjoyment in fiction... "in all great works of fiction, regardless of the grim reality they present, there is an affirmation of life against the transience of that life, an essential defiance.... every great work of art, i would declare pompously, is a celebration, an act of insubordination against the betrayals, horrors and infidelities of life." even in stories that break our hearts, "the perfection and beauty of form rebels against the ugliness and shabiness of the subject matter."

from gatsby, the character whose (on the surface) immorality incites strong criticisms from the more islamic radical of her students, they learn about the collision of dreams and a world that is far from ideal. they learn the importance of dreams but are also warned of the implicit danger within them. "dreams, mr. nyazi, are perfect ideals, complete in themselves. how can you impose them on a constantly changing, imperfect, incomplete reality? you would become a humbert, destroying the object of your dream; or a gatsby, destroying yourself."

from henry james, they learned how insensitivity or extreme practicality can be a means of survival, but how truly *courageous* it is to feel emotions deeply and to act on them.

from jane austen, they learned the importance of ignoring politics (to a certain extent) "not because she didn't know any better but because she didn't allow her work, her imagination, to be swallowed up by the society around her." and that in fact, creating a private space within themselves for their own thoughts and dreams was actually taking a stance in refusing to give up all of themselves to the control of the government.

i experienced a deep sense of catharsis after reading this book. as the author described the emotions surrounding a rare film screening in iran... "For a brief time we experienced collectively the kind of awful beauty that can only be grasped through extreme anguish and expressed through art."